Most people use the end of the year to reflect on what they have accomplished during the year, how they have changed, and what they would like to do for the upcoming year. As you look forward into 2014, what do you see? What things in your life would you like to be different this time next year? What do you resolve to change?
As a psychologist, I work in a daily constant - change. People come to me and want change, but then don't want it. I then say..."Why?" What's your motive for change?
Most people don't know why they want to change, but they do. It may come as a surprise, but most people want to change because they are in pain. Pain? Yes - you know when your body is hurting, you want it to stop, so you go see a doctor. You get a shot, a pill, or an adjustment, and viola! Pain's gone. So, when you have that sort of pain again, you go back to the person who helped make it stop...
Same thing for you emotionally, relationally, and behaviorally. If whatever you do makes you feel better, then you repeat the behavior. If it makes things worse, you don't.
So, if you are doing something that makes your life not so great, why would you keep doing it? Why wouldn't you want to change it?
Therefore, most want change to avoid pain. It can be a difficult process, and sometimes the change for the better is painful in itself (see: my new workout trainer!). However, isn't the pain from harmful behaviors that destroy relationships worse than the pain of making things better for yourself and those whom you love?
"Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie—the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?” John 5:2-6
Isn't that a question?!? "Do you want to get well?"
Do you really want to change and be free from pain?
I'd suggest you see someone about that.
“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Pick up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked. John 5:7-9